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Famous Quotes about Wives I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. ******** When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. ******** After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. ******** By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ******** Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. ******** The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want? ******** I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. ******** "Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays." ******** "I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." ******** "There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." ******** "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't." ******** Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. ******** The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... ******** You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. ******** My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. ******** A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. ******** Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. ******** A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." ******** First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive." ******** Yipyip at 2/15/2009 06:41:00 PM The paradox of our time in history is that We have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just forget it Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember to say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Yipyip at 2/11/2009 06:40:00 PM Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock. ********* To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy. ********* The road to success??.. Is always under construction. ********* Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk. ********* In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it. ********* All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening. ********* Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak. ********* Everyone has a scheme of getting rich.. Which never works. ********* If at first you don't succeed.. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried. ********* You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side. ********* Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner. ********* 42.7% of all statisticsare made on the spot. ********* If you have paper, you don't have a pen??. If you have a pen, you don't have paper?? If you have both, no one calls. ********* If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance. ********* You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming. ********* After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other. ********* The last person to be fired or quit is responsible for all the errors until another person is fired or quits. ********* Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker ********* Yipyip at 2/10/2009 01:39:00 AM
It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be: 1. A friend 2. A companion 3. A lover 4. A brother 5. A father 6. A master 7. A chef 8. An electrician 9. A carpenter 10. A plumber 11. A mechanic 12. A decorator 13. A stylist 14. A sexologist 15. A gynecologist 16. A psychologist 17. A pest exterminator 18. A psychiatrist 19. A healer 20. A good listener 21. An organizer 22. A good father 23. Very clean 24. Sympathetic 25. Athletic 26. Warm 27. Attentive 28. Gallant 29. Intelligent 30. Funny 31. Creative 32. Tender 33. Strong 34. Understanding 35. Tolerant 36. Prudent 37. Ambitious 38. Capable 39. Courageous 40. Determined 41. True 42. Dependable 43. Passionate 44. Compassionate WITHOUT FORGETTING TO: 45. Give her compliments regularly 46. Love shopping 47. Be honest 48. Be very rich 49. Not stress her out 50. Not look at other girls AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO: 51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself 52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself 53. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes IT IS VERY IMPORTANT: 54. Never to forget: * birthdays * anniversaries * arrangements she makes.............. HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY 1. Show up naked Yipyip at 2/10/2009 01:28:00 AM
Reaction from different countries: ************ ** U.S.A: "A ship coming to Freedom was attacked by terrorists. We will not sit quiet and we will teach them a lesson. Bin Laden you can run but you cannot hide we will find you and destroy your Al-Qaeda network." (President Bush........ whoelse?) ************ ** U.K: "I have spoken to the President of United States and we have both agreed that the sinking of Titanic is significant prove that Saddam Hussein is clearly behind this attack, Iraq is imposing a threat to the world and this has to be dealt with." (Prime Minister Blair) ************ ** Iraq: "LOL!!!" (President Saddam Hussain) ************ ** Israel: "These Hamas and other terrorist network is enough evidence to say that sinking of Titanic is not an accident but it was their suicide bombers who have commited such a crime. We will now impose curfew on the Palestinians, detain them, exile them, kill them, starve them, destroy their homes and refugee camps." (Ariel Sharon....) ************ ** Canada: "Titanic who?" (Canadian Prime Minister) ************ ** India: "Is mein Pakistan ka haath hai. We have received passports of Pakistani extremists from the Titanic debris. Pakistanis will have to pay for such horrendous act of terrorism. We are now deploying more soldiers to the border." (Prime Minister Vajpayee) ************ ** Pakistan: "Sind may Double Sawari per ghair muayyana muddat ke liye pabandi" (President Musharraf) ************ ** UN: "Shit happens right??" (Sec.Gen. Kofi Annan) ************ ** Survivors: "Uhh. Helllooo. Is anyone listening... it was an iceberg..hellloooooo." ************ ** Yipyip at 2/10/2009 01:21:00 AM
1."We will do it" means "You will do it" 2."You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you" 3."We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same" 4."Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done "At least not tomorrow!" 5."After discussion we will decide-I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do" 6."There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied" 7."Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later" 8."We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time" 9."We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time." 10."We had slight differences of opinion "means "We had actually fought" 11."Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me" 12."You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!" 13."We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is" 14."Well Family is important; your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected," means, "Well you know..." 15."We are a team," means, "I am not the only one to be blamed" 16."That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it" 17."All the Best" means "You are in trouble" Yipyip at 2/10/2009 01:19:00 AM
***********1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us griping about you leaving it down. *********** 2. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again! *********** 3. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it. *********** 4. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. *********** 5. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her. *********** 6. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. *********** 7. Crying is blackmail. *********** 8. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! *********** 9. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand. *********** 10. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? *********** 11. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. *********** 12. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. *********** 13. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. *********** 14. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. *********** 15. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer. *********** 16. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. *********** 17. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. *********** 18. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. *********** 19. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we. *********** 20. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends. *********** 21. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. *********** 22. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. *********** 23. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. *********** 24. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. *********** 25. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. *********** 26. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. *********** 27. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks. *********** 28. You have enough clothes. *********** 29. You have too many shoes. *********** 30. Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.) *********** 31. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz. *********** 32. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape. *********** 33. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping. Yipyip at 2/10/2009 01:11:00 AM "Dinner in the Sky Las Vegas" Yipyip at 2/09/2009 05:45:00 PM    THANK GOD IM A MAN Yipyip at 2/03/2009 07:30:00 PM
Looking at my Blog's name, yip faster than light, it'll be nice being posted with something relating to speed, lets see..... Em .. here is some  This is Rossi, 1 great MotoGP racer..and only REAL boys/men will love this bike racing sport just don't try to RIDE if you don't have the guts, trust me, its DANGEROUS! I have a broken left arm, fractured skull, snapped tendons in my knee (i think), scars everywhere on my body, out aligned back-bone, wanna ride? think again..yet i still love it!  Knee scrapping corners is his job, imagine doing a turn at 110 km/h - 140 km/h( I'm talking bikes,doing a corner with a car is nothing), I've tried 140 it felt so nice! fell once in Genting, its was all because of a pot-hole! shit! lucky thing i dint broke my arm AGAIN.  This is a wheelie, done to impress chicks,i tried to do this with my bike, its was rubbish, i almost went into a bulldozer, probably my bike is lack of power to pull a wheelie. Why is a super bike so expensive here in Malaysia? damn!  YeeHaww! just look at this, see how low can you go with a super bike, the ass is just few CMs away from the tarmac, so i can say, racing around in a car (metal box) is NOTHING, its just sissy! or kindly said, pussy.  See, This is Rossi again, doing a 'spider man' move after losing traction of his front wheel,  Okay, this is the 'mid-air legs up yoga' not everyone can do this, only for those who understands the consequences. These bikes running on a 4-cyclinder 1.0 c.c engine can simply shoot up to 300 km/h in no time, and again its not your average transport and not meant for pussys and/or sissys.  This is Nicky, 22 this year, me too. He inspire me much, although i dont know him, but his determination to stand next to Rossi is so strong, it actually MOVED me! i get into GP racing as soon as i got the chance.Okay la, story ends here... Yipyip at 2/03/2009 05:26:00 PM
 Heres me, i've reached melacca in about 2hours drive, wondering why im on the tree? yeah, im waiting for my friend to pack-up his stuff, i go all the way there just to fetch him back to kl.  heres me,again. My ass are already numb, due to massive jam in malacca city, should have listened to Hitz.Fm's 'Ford Cruisers'. Thats the 5th stick of cigg i've taken, look at the frustated face, you can spell 'wtf?! jam' from my face. Its ver hot, i mean it, VERY hot that day.  Later on that very night...okay, so i missed those driving-at-night picture to penang, because of we're way tooo exhausted to keep our eyes open, so we took turns sleeping and driving. Its a fuggin long drive i can say, look at this --> Kl ---2hours---> Melacca ----2hours---> KL ----4hours----> Penang ---4hours---> KL and this is in ONE day. In the pic, im in a Siamese Temple, at Pulau Tikus, Penang. Aiya, i lazy to type la, u look see look see ur self la.   Yipyip at 2/03/2009 03:53:00 AM
 Okay, look at this pic, i guess im just involving myself in this blogging world, m not a good blogger but i have my bunny fren helping me, i'll be good in no time, thanks.
Yipyip at 2/03/2009 01:30:00 AM
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